크고 헐렁헐렁한 바지
어렸을 때 내 꿈은 단순했다, 다만
몸에 맞는 바지를 입고 싶었다
이 꿈은 늘 배반당했다
아버지가 입던 큰 바지를 줄여 입거나
모처럼 시장에서 새로 사온 바지를 입을 때조차
몸에 맞는 바지를 입을 수가 없었다
한창 클 때는 몸집이 하루가 다르게 자라니
작은 바지는 곧 못 입게 되지, 하며
어머니는 늘 크고 헐렁헐렁한 바지를 사오셨다
크고 헐렁헐렁한 바지는 나를 짓누른다
크고 헐렁헐렁한 바지를 입으면
바지가 내 몸을 입고 있다는 착각에 빠지곤 했다
충분히 자라지 못한 빈약한 몸은
큰 바지를 버거워했다
크고 헐렁헐렁한 바지통 사이로
내 영혼과 인생은 빠져 나가 버리고
난 염소처럼 어기적거렸다
매음녀처럼 껌을 씹는 크고 헐렁헐렁한 바지
나는 바지에 조롱당하고 바지에 끌려다녔다
이건 시대착오적이에요, 라고
크고 헐렁헐렁한 바지를 향해 당당하게 항의하지 못했다
크고 헐렁헐렁한 바지, 오, 모멸스런 인생
바지는 내 꿈을 부서뜨리고 악마처럼 웃는다
바지는 내게 인생을 이렇게 살아라, 저렇게 살아라, 라고 참견한다
원치 않는 삶에 질질 끌려 다니지 않으려면
진작 바지의 독재에 저항했어야 했다
진작 그 바지를 찢거나 벗어 버렸어야 했다
아니면 진작 바지에 길들여졌어야 했다
크고 헐렁헐렁한 바지, 오, 급진적인 바지
내 몸과 맞지 않는 바지통 속에서
내 다리는 불안하게 흔들린다
불사조처럼 군림하는 크고 헐렁헐렁한 바지는
검은 그림자를 늘어뜨리고
끝끝내 길들여지지 않는 내 인생을 뒤흔든다
Big, Baggy Pants
When I was younger,
My dream was simple.
I wanted pants that fit me.
This dream was never to be.
I had to wear my dad’s hand-me-downs pants
Altered to make them smaller.
Even when I got new pants from the mall,
I could not buy a pair that fit.
Mother used to say,
“You are young, and your body is changing every day.”
“You will outgrow these pants very soon,
They will be useless.”
She always bought me big, baggy pants.
Big, baggy pants oppressed me.
When I put them on
I was confused, as if the pants had put me on
My small weak body, still as yet un-grown,
suffered from the burden of the pants.
My soul and my life slipped out from the space
between my body and pants
I waddled like a goat,
Tossed around inside the pants
Like gum in the mouth of a whore.
I was made ridiculous and dragged around by my pants.
“These pants are so old fashioned ” I thought.
But I did not protest aloud against my big, baggy pants.
Big, baggy pants, oh, contemptible life.
The pants break my dreams and smile wickedly all the while.
“Live this way. Live that way,” my pants command, meddling in my life.
So as not to be dragged into this life
I should have long ago protested against the tyranny of the pants.
I should have long ago torn them off
Or submitted uncomplainingly to their dictatorship.
Big, baggy pants, oh, oppressive pants.
Inside the ill-fitting pants,
My legs shivered uncomfortably.
Big, baggy pants dominate me, hanging over me like a dark shadow,
Ceaselessly shaking my life, like a dog with a rat
As I remain neither submissive nor untamed.
시인 장석주 by Poet, Chang, SeokJoo
The poet, Seok-Ju Chang, was born in Non-San, Chung-Cheong-Nam-Do, South Korea, in January 8, 1955. His first published
work was “Midnight” that he received new and emerging poet award from Monthly Literature in 1975. In 1979, he awarded his poem, “Fly, Gloomy Dream” inChosun Il-Bo, Spring Literature and Dong-A-Il-Bo, Spring Literature, Critique, “Existence and Unrealism”.
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Translated by Clara Soonhee Kwon-Tatum, Ph.D and Matthew Lewis, MA
